Giants Midnight Replay

Walking Off

Last night my boss took me out to eat, we went out for burgers and he tried to convince me to not quit my job. We ate our burgers and had a couple of uncomfortable moments. Eating, drinking, me talking about “how money matters to me now”, as if I’m some sort of adult. After dinner we split ways, I went drinking with a friend, had a few too many and ended up running around SOHO kicking trashcans over at 3 am. At some point I blacked out, got blue paint all over my pants, told a poet that I hate poetry and lost $20. I woke up at 1pm today, my head was throbbing. 

There’s no walk off hit in real life. I can’t make an amazing latte for someone, get cheered by a room full of satisfied customers, be mobbed by delirious co-workers and carried out on their shoulders. Life doesn’t provide the moments that baseball provides. I guess that’s why we get shitty drunk and run around manhattan kicking trashcans over. 

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The Omar Vizquel Defensive Excellence Award Goes To:

Aubrey Huff for sticking with the under-thrown ball to nail Miranda at 2nd. 

The Eugenio Velez Defensive Indifference Award Goes To:

Freddy Sanchez… surprisingly. For making 2 errors on one play, bobbling a ball and then throwing it too low for huff. 

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The Setoguchi Award (Hero) Goes to:

Lincecum…… I wanted it tonight. I was sniffing a no-hitter when I turned the game on when I got home in the 2nd inning. “is there a hit yet”?

My girlfriend goes to sleep and I ask her…..”should I wake you up if anything “historic” happens?”….. It’s gonna happen… someday. Until then, sleep tight. 

The Datsyuk Award (Goat) Goes to:

Ian Kennedy, not only for throwing a damn fine game but for breaking up the no-hitter in the 6th. disappointing, I was really feeling like tonight could have been the night for Timmy. But just like Datsyuk… you have to recognize greatness. 

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More Stuffs

This makes me wonder if the phrasing “Andre The Giant” is copy write, or if they felt it was appropriate to call it “Andre el Gigante” just because of his latin roots? Either way it is kinda cool, and kinda lame, I can’t decide yet.  

Buster sniffs out a hit. 

“Vaaat I git no vin today, eeez ok”

Cody Ross does the Freddy Sanchez “fake like it’s inside” dance

Then he throws his bat like a spoiled brat. haha

Tim threw two perfect corner pitches for strikes in a row in the 7th inning. Both times they showed a close up of his face and he was mouthing “fuck” with a disappointed look on his face. Perfection must be hard. 

Buster Posey is making gloves drop like beats……. ok that didn’t work as a metaphor. Whatever, Posey is playing great. 

Can some internet nerd draw some lasers shooting out of these eyes? Cause Ford is straight up cyclopsing dudes with these lazy browns. “Ya, I just stole on you… what?”

Huff has the swing of the game, with this karate chop fouling a ball at his eyes. 

Amy G. is the only thing in the world that makes Cody not want to smile. I feel ya Cody, I feel ya. 

GMR Field Trip

The Mets have a scoreboard problem. They start playing the “Let’s Go Met’s” chant before their first batter even gets into the box, which leads to the inevitable scoreboard prompt burnout by the 5th inning. I say, only sounds until at least the 4th. 

There was some pretty great banter back and forth between the Met’s and Giants fans during the game. And it went back and forth pretty well, through our bases loaded pop-outs, and through their bases loaded double play. Organic “Let’s Go Giants” Chants were squashed by thunderous boos but Giants fans definitely grabbed a foothold in Citi field tonight. 

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I’m just gonna post pictures and give a couple of my thoughts. But first…..

Stock watch

Rising stock:

Schierholtz, Fontenot, Lopez, and Huff (a little bit).

Falling stock:

Tejada (majorly), Burriss, Ross, and Vogelsong (sorry buddy)

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If you read this blog you know that I am a Fontenot fan. He just embodies the underdog thing. He had an important hit tonight and played solid defense at SS. 

Mets fan definitely remember Mota, and they don’t like him. Note to self: look up what Mota ever did to Mets fans. 

The AAA crew. Ford, Burriss, and Rohlinger, chumming it up on the fence. 

Just showing again how short Fontenot really is. Sure the angle distorts the view a little bit, but not much. 

Stretching it out. 

Burrell and Huff were chatting the whole afternoon before the game. There was not a lot of smiles going around. In fact the only one acting loose was Bochy who played catch with Ross for a while. Lots of focused looks on the Giants before the game. 

Henry Schulman in the wild. zoiks!

The only action shot I took all night. I was in foul ball territory and I got about 4 that were hit in about a 30 foot radius, so I couldn’t be holding the camera the whole time. 

Constant coverage!

Terribler Than Terrible

“These aren’t your father’s Nationals” That’s what Krukow said on the pregame show. I am assuming he was speaking about the endless futility of the Expos. At the same time Kruk might have a point. The Nationals are not terrible, but to say that the they are not terrible would be a lie. They ARE terrible, but the Giants are terribler. The Giants are the 111 loss 2004 Diamondbacks right now. The Giants are the fucking 43 win 2003 Detroit Tigers right now. The Giants are the fucking 1994-2010 Pittsburg Pirates right now.  The Giants’ bats are limper than a senior citizen’s wrist. Ok let’s leave it at that. So let’s all just do some jumping jacks, loosen up and settle in for a LONG road trip. Let’s enjoy this round of terrible baseball while it lasts. Let’s hope it doesn’t last long. 

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The Omar Award goes to: 

Aubrey Huff for the excellent play down the first base line early in the game. 

The Velez Award goes to:

Aaron Rowand and Cody Ross. I think everyone knows what I am talking about…… Just look at the picture.

“let’s share this ball and be happy” says those dorks.

 

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The Dorus Rijkers Award (Hero) goes to: 

Tim Lincecum who found his good pitches a couple of innings too late. Poor bastard, if you don’t throw a shutout then you pretty much have no shot at winning with this lineup. 

I forgot to snap a pic of Tim tonight so I stole this pic from here..

 

The Sea Award (Goat) goes to:

Jason Marquis who is a mutha fucking Giant KILLER. It’s unbelievable how much the Giants suck right now, and Marquis is just the wrong type of pitcher for us to face right now. I would rather face Halliday, Sabathia, Josh Johnson or pretty much any number of aces. A ground ball pitcher is the last thing I want to see on an upcoming schedule. 

Here he is hitting an RBI hit and run on an impossible pitch to hit. 

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Bonus Crap:

This bunt that worked (but ultimately didn’t work) doesn’t bother me. We are up against a ground ball double play pitcher, and we have a guy on base. Solid option. 

This bunt does bother me, Miguel Tejada, former MVP, former slugger is bunting with no one on base and 36 year old legs. Now Tejada made it to first, I know, fair enough. But it just proves that Tejada knows that he sucks, and in my opinion should not be playing. 

Right after Rowand and Cody decided that they wanted to share a fly ball Nix blasts a 2 run HR. Perfect timing. Can things go worse for the Giants?…….

Yes… Cody (why am I still in the lineup) Ross hits a single and gets throw out by 8-12 feet at 2nd base. 

Buster (Don’t vote for me for the All-Star game ) Posey along with the rest of the Giants hitters swing about 20+ times at this pitch. 

Posey throws his second runner out except he is called safe (make-up-call). This guy went on to score on that impossible hit and run Marquis hit. 

Bring in the scrubs!!!!

Possible Giants Slogans For The 2011 Season (Part 1)

Truly there was “Magic Inside” last year. So I am not suggesting that the Giants will fail at coming up with some good slogans this year. BUT I figured I might as well come up with some simple designs.

Here is my first one. 

It’s simple. Let’s not get too wrapped up in ourselves just because we beat down the world last year. I don’t care that we have our own reality show. In fact the whole show should be Huff tearing the heads off of dolls and Redneck Bumgarner prying beer tabs off with his teeth. I wanna see close games, take-out slides, and dirty uniforms. Let’s stay as ugly as we can this season. If we are not the underdogs then we can certainly play and look like dogs. Huff is the perfect guy for this campaign. He has a “I don’t give a fuck” attitude and a perfect shit brick face to match it. I love this guy (who did you expect, babyface Posey?)

Hello 3rd Place

Giants’ bullpen throws another Lincecum game away against the d-backs 7 to 8

Screenshot of the game. 

Jazz Hands strikes deep, but to no avail.

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3 out of 5 Neukoms

Negatives

- 4 walks taken vs. 9 walks given.

- Affeldt gives up the game winning run on a WP

- Uribe doesn’t get the ball out of his glove during a crucial DP

- 2 for 12 RISP

Positives

- Freddie Sanchez is AWESOME on defense. 

- Uribe is soo clutch but was completely robbed in his last AB by the umpire

- we had back to back HRs for the first time this year. 

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The Spongebob Award (hero) goes to Aubrey Huff for giving Lincecum a chance to win after a not-so-stellar start. 

The Squidward Award (villain) goes to the Giants bullpen without whom Lincecum would have a 9-0 record. Specifically Affeldt who allowed the winning run on a WP.

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Some extra screenshots.
Bochy getting conned into dancing by Uribe…….. ohhhh white people. 

Rubs head against the wall..

Maybe we should try this again….. we did score 7 runs… that’s pretty decent right?

Brooklyn’s own Rich Aurilia was in da house

Freddie Sanchez was 2 for 2 with a sac bunt…. not bad. 

now THAT’s a pitch-out….. might as well throw to 3rd base.

God I love that Mustache! too bad it’s hanging from an unreliable relief pitcher’s upper lip.

Umpire Mark Wegner Jawing at Uribe and Bam Bam Meulens after grabbing his “twinkie” after Uribe struck out.

Fucking bush league shit

Bochy’s head is SOOOO BIG!

Best Seats EVER! Worst Heckler EVER!

Giants take the series from the Pirates 6-0

Screenshot of the week.

4 out of 5 Neukom’s 

Nothing spectacular here just solid defense behind Sanchez’s steller start. 

The Paul Kersey award (hero) of the game goes to Sanchez who is slowly putting the league on notice as to how good he can be. 11 k’s over 8 innings of shutout ball. 

The Creeps award (villan) goes to the WORST HECKLER I HAVE EVER HEARD. Who sat right behind us. Here are some of his highlights:

“Hey you just got traded to Milwakee……….. (long pause) ….. for an italian sausage…….. I heard he’s fast!”

it gets worse…..

“Let’s go 52 pickup”  (said to number 52)

and even worse….. my personal favorite, worst heckle ever. 

“Hey clipboard guy, it’s a good thing you got those gloves on,  you don’t want to get a paper-cut”  

Some random notes. 

Zito is a super nice guy. He worked this whole line for autographs. He consistently comes over to the line and signs. 

Jack Taschner is also a nice guy. I miss his big personality on the team. I don’t miss his sketchy outings. 

Also I got on TV. hahaha was just watching the game again and saw my dumb ass sitting in the 3rd row. 

When is a Game Good?

Giants take the season opener 9-3 over the Pirates.

Screenshot of the game

Epic Garret Jones Fail!

Plus a bonus face bounce!

4 out of 5 Neukoms

Renteria bobbled a back handed stab at at a grounded and Zito promptly threw a wild pitch. Zito also walked 3 hitter. 

Other than that, there were some nice defensive plays in the field. Notably Huff’s good defense and a pretty nice grab in right by Torres. 

The Caption Crunch award (hero) goes to Aubrey Huff. Besides the nice defensive plays Huff got on base EVERY time he stepped to the plate. 

Huff’s stats for the game: 2 for 2, Triple, 2 Hit By Pitches (Vendetta?), and a walk!

The Soggies award (villan) goes to the bad Hecklers that sat next to us. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good heckler, but when you are saying the same thing OVER AND OVER AND OVER. “Hey 52….. my mom can throw better than you…….” X 50. pretty uncreative. 

Some other interesting things that happened in the game. 

We went early to say hi to some players and possibly catch a BP ball. We got lucky and had Jonathan Sanchez handed my girlfriend and I a ball each. And then I went up on the arcade and scrambled for a Ryan Church BP Home Run. 

Side note: There was a Jack Taschner Sighting!!!

J

The game was not as interesting as last nights game. It is one thing to beat the Braves who are considered to be one of the best teams in the NL, it is an entirely different thing to pummel a rookie pitcher who has a historically bad team supporting him. 

The Longest HR Trot Ever!!!! (Bengie Molina)

I am always happy to be at a game but this one was just not as exciting. But I’ll take it. 

A Recap in Screenshots and Garbled Kid Speak

Matt Cain make very stressed face.

Juan Uribe, run run run, tehe

Catcher says “I KICK YOU IN BALLS!!!!!!”

Man in suit says “I PUNCH THE AIR HUYYYYYYYAA”

Aubrey Huff makes the ball stop! YAY no more runs for the bad guys

WHACK! Take that mr. Pitcher I make the ball go towards you with stick.

YAY WE WON! everybody slap hands and SMILE!!!!!!

A Well-(emeyer) Fought Battle

Sorry I am running out of ways to play on Wellemeyer’s name. It’s probably just as well, maybe I should get all the bad puns out before the season starts.

So I guess we are all looking for some meaning in a Spring Training game. Wellsy’s 5 shutout innings, Huff’s HR and his defensive start of a double play are the small things we can be happy about. We should throw Renteria’s Hr in there as well since anything we can squeeze out of that 18 million dollar mistake is gravy at this point. It’s nice to see Hinshaw get a solid inning in also.

So here are some of the highlights in the form of screenshots.

Renteria’s HR!!

Huff’s 2 run HR…….. Nice swing.

My cat looking at a bird out the window………J/K it’s Zito…. who asked Mychael Urban to interview him …..ppffffft!

Bonus young kuip pic!!! awesome!

Huff Giveth, and Huff Taketh Away

Huff Giveth!

Huff Taketh Away.

ok so it’s not a perfect example because Huff technically could not catch that ball. But I am going to say that this photo represents his bad fielding (even though it doesn’t). Anyways