Last year I branded Kevin Fransen “a lovable puppy”. Now I want to make it a tradition. I intend to give the KFMGPA (Kevin Frandsen Memorial Golden Puppy Award) to a new player every year. The requirements are:
• They receive way more attention specifically from the female contingent of fans than is proportionate to how good they are. (aka. girls think they are “hot”)
• They are not a super star. (Sorry Buster, and Timmy)
• They kind of look like they are a puppy.
• They are not super intelligent (sounds like all ball players are safe here).
Here are the candidates.
#1. Alex Hinshaw
While Hinshaw might have looks that could mow down a 14 year old wearing a Noah Lowry shirt, his low 90s fastball has a hard time even getting past your average bat. Which I suppose makes him a perfect candidate.
#2. Thomas Neal
Better known as @Tdaddyneal on twitter, is taking the social network path into the hearts of female San Francisco fans.
Girlfriend says: ….. 2 Steve Finley’s out of the possible 5.
#3. Brandon Belt
Don’t let that docile southern drawl draw you in ladies. This guy crushes ladies and baseballs. Aside from this guy’s non-neck he is in the clear lead so far.
Girlfriend Says:……. 3.75 Steve Finley’s out of 5
#4. Emmanuel Burriss
Burriss is on track to smash the modern day SF Giants record for “guy you see the most that never plays”. But again, it’s that babyface that make you think he’s never been taken out at 2nd on a double play breakup. Now if he could only keep his fragile feet from breaking he would be about as useful to the Giants as the guy who we named this award after. (just kidding burriss, we love you man)
#5 Nate Schierholtz
Are you kidding me…… The keeper of the key to most abs in baseball, proves that the only thing he is lacking is some hair on his dome and a decent shot at becoming more than a defensive replacement. Just look at those fucking abs!!!!
I’m throwing this guy in the mix cause…. crazy girl attracting eyes + Minor League Talent = Kevin Frandsen 2.0
Girlfriend Says: …….. sorry….. she went to sleep.
Time to honor past winners.
2008, 2009 and 2010 KFMGPA goes to: The original Golden Puppy himself, Kevin Frandsen
2007 KFMGPA goes to: Noah Lowry…….. retroactively
Ok … everyone vote, or I will have to just pick one.